A 5-Minute Reset Before a Hard Conversation

Before a conversation you have been dreading, your body gets loud. This is a short, physical way to bring the volume down so you can say what you came to say.

Minute one: feet and chair

Sit down and press both feet into the floor. Notice the chair holding your weight. You are not bracing for anything yet, you are just here.

Minutes two and three: longer exhales

Breathe in for a count of four and out for a count of six. The longer exhale is the signal your nervous system listens to. Keep it going and let your shoulders drop on each one.

Minute four: name the one thing

Decide the single point this conversation needs to land. One sentence. When things get heated, that sentence is what you return to.

Minute five: soften your voice first

Say the sentence out loud once, quietly, to the empty room. Hearing yourself say it calmly makes it easier to say it calmly again with someone else in the room.